Dating is difficult all around but it’s especially hard when you’re gay. You can’t always judge a book by its cover – she could just like flannel shirts and have a pixie cut. So how can you tell if she’s gay or bi just by looking? The answer is you can’t.
You’ll just have to approach her and start with a friendly conversation. Get to know one another and casually drop hints that you’re gay – maybe mention a recent LGBTQ event you went to, an actress you think is hot, etc. Her reaction to the hints could help define her sexual preference. During this talk, try picking on little hints she may be dropping as well. Does she mention any exs and their gender? How about her favorite actress, TV show or band?
Flirt a little and see where it gets you. Mention that you find her attractive, playfully touch her hand and watch for a reaction. If you find her moving closer and flirting back, she’s probably into you. Pay attention to her body language. When you stare into her eyes, is she staring back? Eye contact during your conversation is key, a gaze can be a dead giveaway into how someone is feeling.
Last but not least – tell her that you’re gay. This chat is coming to an end, you’ve enjoyed getting to know this woman, and you’ve hinted and flirted, now it’s time to go big or go home. Before you say your goodbyes and exchange other pleasantries, say something similar to this – “I’ve enjoyed getting to know you. I’m a lesbian, if you hadn’t already picked up on that and was wondering if you would like to go on a date sometimes.” Yes, you could get rejected and yes, you could have picked up on the wrong signs – this way you’re not leaving it up to chance. Who knows, you could get a new girlfriend out of it.
